Monday, 12 December 2016

Pushing through the hard...

Four weeks ago my husband left to go out east to involve himself in a regeneration program for men.  A Christ centred recovery program that really resonated with his heart and so he entered the program to see what it was all about.  At the same time my daughter and I started weight lifting and a little bit of running.  You're probably thinking why are you changing the subject right now.  Well if you lived here you wouldn't even question it, my husband and the kids are used to it :-) but in this case I'm not really changing the subject. 

Day one of weight lifting and you feel pumped, I can do this, I'm going to feel good and my body is going to be strong and healthy. You're proud of yourself for what you've accomplished, you take a day off to mend those muscles and then day two comes.  

Day two came and the battle to just give up was so strong.  I thought to myself, you don't just do this for a couple months, or a year, this could be a life long commitment.  And the dread of that hit me, the pull to just give up now because it'd be way too hard to maintain and yet the reality was it's only an hour three days a week, a little window of time so what's the big deal.

Well the big deal was the pain of it, the pushing till I couldn't lift anymore and the running till I couldn't run anymore.  My heart feeling like it was going to explode in my chest, my legs and arms feeling like jelly and like I really had no strength.  The feeling to give up was so strong.  And then I thought of the men in the program where my husband is.  The choice they have made to give up what they are addicted to, the day to day, hour to hour, sometimes minute to minute choices to do the right thing, to deny themselves what their bodies so crave. 

That day writing to my husband I shared how in my battle to do the weights and running I had a tiny glimpse of the battle many of those men face every day, multiple times throughout the day.  The choice to push through and do the hard things or give up and give into their cravings, the cravings that give them comfort and fill the deep void inside.  

Of course I realize there is really no comparison to my lifting weights and their giving up drugs or alcohol in the physical. If I keep lifting and running, sure it's good for my body but if I choose to quit it really doesn't affect those around me.  But with these men the choice to go on and push through or the choice to give up has mountainous consequence in their lives and in the lives of those around them. Yet for a brief moment I could feel what I would imagine the strong pull they feel to just give in and give up because it's just too hard and so what's the point.  Staying the course could be a life long struggle, a commitment, is it even worth it.

But it's in the pushing through of the hard things that muscle develops...spiritual muscle. I serve a Saviour who conquered death, and the same power that raised Him from the grave resides in me if I surrender to Him.  Think about that...if you are in Christ the same power that raised Him from the dead resides in you.  Yet how often do I live in defeat, neglecting what resides in me. 

In 2 Peter 1: 3, 4 it says: "His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness.  Through these he has given us his very great and precious promises, so that through them you may participate in the divine nature and escape the corruption in the world cause by evil desires."

We have an enemy who wants to keep us in that so called "grave." 

What's your "grave?" What's the thing that keeps you from living, from really living out of all that is deep inside of you, the dreams, the desires...godly desires and dreams that God has placed in your heart? 









Broken relationships





You name it...what's your "grave" we all have them.  And just as Jesus called Lazarus out of his grave, He's calling you out of yours.

Things to be thankful for...

2823. Another beautiful day
2824. Encouraging words from my dad to me & my husband
2825. Sunlight & shadows
2826. Morning frost
2827. Visit with Lily while doing chores
2828. Tea & visit with a friend
2829. Milkshake from Kayla & Sarah
2830. Laughter
2831. Visit with a friend in the hospital
2832. Refreshing walk
2833. Those who fought for our freedom
2834. Jessica over for a visit
2835. Dinner and visit with friends
2836. Sisters chatting
2837. Encouragement from church family
2838. Beautiful pictures taken by Charissa

I'm not one to get my picture taken very often, I'm always behind the camera :-) and so it was nice to have these taken before my husband left.

2839. Lunch with family & prayer of blessing
2840. My husband's words to our children
2841. A new journey for my husband
2842. Morning workout with Charissa
2843. Chat with Jocelyne
2844. My husband made it safely to Saint John
2845. Walk with a friend
2846. Morning fog
2847. Walk in the Frink Centre with Charissa & Cooper

2848. Beautiful day
2849. Great weather for a late afternoon photo-shoot with the neighbour kids

2850. Health and strength
2851. Call from my husband - good to hear his voice
2852. Letter from our sponsor child
2853. Hay for the winter
2854. Tea and conversation with friends
2855. Chores and chats with Lily
2856. Inspiration
2857. Another beautiful fall day
2858. Driving and chatting with Matt
2859. Time spent with Will, Amy and Lily
2860. Lily so interested in Matt...smiling

2861. Relaxing Sunday with Will, Amy & Lily

Our precious Lily is growing so fast.

2862. A fun game with Will, Amy and her parents
2863. Will got a promotion at work
2864. Lily babbling and smiling
2865. Visit with my sister and her family
2866. Celebrating Rachel's birthday
2867. God's provision
2868. Warm sunshine on a cold day

2869. Our lives are in God's hands
2870. My sister and her husband have landed safely
2871. Games with my nieces
2872. Beautiful, peaceful morning in the barn
2873. Relaxing in the quiet, knitting

2874. Chores with the girls
2875. Hanging out with Matt, my nephew and nieces
2876. Laying by the fire
2877. Chat with Jocelyne
2878. Another quiet morning in the barn
2879. Cute cats

2880. Kids home from school
2881. Matt's help with driving
2882. My sister & her husband having a good time
2883. Movie night with the kids
2884. Night time prayers
2885. Morning chores with the girls
2886. Hike & Dairy Queen with the kids and Matt

That time when your brother finds a snake in the woods and you think your sister is coming to rescue you...


2887. Some sunshine
2888. Good nights sleep
2889. Beautiful sunrise while doing chores
2890. Walk with the girls
2891. A game of Scattergories
2892. Safe flights home for my sister & her husband and my husband's mom
2893. Home
2894. Charissa's smile
2895. Working out with Charissa
2896. A letter from my husband
2897. Hanging out with Matt, chatting
2898. Dinner at mom and dad's
2899. A chat with good friends
2900. Open hearts
2901. Knitting
2902. Good nights sleep
2903. Visit from Kayla
2904. Sound of rain through my open window
2905. Tea with a friend
2906. My husband's voice
2907. Conversations with Lily
2908. Time spend with Silas, Molly and Lola
2909. Imaginations
2010. Visit from Kayla and Sarah
2011. Laughter
2012. Wedding of a friend
2013. Children
2014. Chat with Jocelyne
2015. Chatting with Matt and Charissa
2016. Refreshing walk with Charissa and Cooper
2017. My church
2018. Jocelyne visiting her dad
2019. A call from my husband
2020. Waking up to a covering of snow

2021. A fun and beautiful morning with Matt, Charissa & Cooper trudging through the woods looking for a christmas tree

In my letter to my husband I wrote: I had a fun morning with the kids searching for a tree, the tree is far from perfect but the memories of finding it are.

2022. Tea & conversation with a friend
2923. Prayer
2924. Beautiful freezing fog and sunshine

2925. Help from Matt
2926. Letter from my husband
2927. Rain through the night
2928. Morning sunshine glistening off the rain soaked trees
2929. Lunch with a friend 
2930. Call from my brother
2931. Smooth but bumpy sailing for my dad picking up a firetruck in the states.

1 comment:

  1. So much to be thankful for! Thank you for sharing your ramblings, your heart, and your photos, Tina! 😄😄